Saturday, February 5, 2011

Xbox Lives


I loaded X-Box live the other day, and guess who should bro up with me on Call of Duty but BLesnar81. Yeah, the fucking BROCK LESNAR. I'm real sure cuz like he fucking sounded like Brock would, and that's the kind of epic name Brock would pick.

We get the map started, and it's capture the fucking FLAG. So what does Brock do? He gets the insurgents in a four point choke hold and breaks their neck. Like, holy shit. I didn’t even know you could do that. Everyone’s trying to boot him off and I’m like “he's just wearing his full contact motherfucking body suit.”

But then it just gets weirder. We were playing Sonic the Hedgehog and I swear to he ripped the face right off some god damn flying bug thing. At this point I was also totally bugging out and yelling in the mic BROCK BROCK BROCK but I bet he gets that all the time. All of a sudden Sonic's got this robot monkey thing and he's got Dr Robotnik in a ankle bar. Like holy fuck.

So yeah, we had a pretty good time after that. We chatted about the UFC championship coming up, how to one punch kill a guy, what kind of pussy we've been scoring recently. You know, bro stuff. I think we could even be friends, if I didn’t have so many more achievements than him. I dont want to wreck my standing in the Live community, even for the single most pumped aggro man alive.

And that was my kick ass dream about meeting the coolest bro in the UFC. I mean, check him out.

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